8 Signs You’re NOT in a Sorority

Where are all my non-Panhellenic ladies out there? Oops. Sorry, if you’re like me, then it may take you a bit to figure out what Panhellenic means. Well, it’s an umbrella term for those involved in Greek Life, which includes sororities. Ahh, sororities. You’re either in one or not, plain and simple. I can say that this blogger has not gone Greek, and here are some signs that you the dear reader might not be in a sorority either.

Sign 1: ‘Big’ and ‘Little’ Are Sizes

These terms strictly refer to the sizes of food all the way to people. To you they are not things you would put the word ‘my’ in front of. Instead they help you convey to the cashier at McDonalds what size fries you want. I know I’ve seen one too many tweets that have confused the hell out me that say: “OMG, my Big is the best ever.” And don’t even get me started on when my sorority friends explain that they have ‘grand-bigs’, as well.

Sign 2: Thinking You Can Bring Non-Greek Guys to Frat Parties

Wait, I can’t bring my boyfriend inside to a frat party where they give away free alcohol to girls? This has never happened to me, mainly due to my lack of formal boyfriends, but I’ve had non-sorority friends who have legit tried to get their boyfriend into a frat party and see nothing wrong with it. Even I know that’s a no-no.

Sign 3: You Tailgate in an Actual Parking Lot

When there’s a big football game on campus, you typically aren’t cool enough to get invited to the backyard of a satellite house to tailgate and actually never attend the big game. Instead, you end up tailgating in a parking lot next to the stadium out of the back of your mom’s bright red minivan, sans alcohol.

Sign 4: You Only Have 3 Friends

When a bunch of girls congregate based on their shared interests, like sororities, then friendships are bound to happen. But chances are if you’re not in a sorority, you may not be the most sociable of people. I know I’m not. It takes a lot for me to actually leave my dorm room on a Friday night or even make new friends. In this situation, you might have accumulated only like three friends. That’s all I need.

Sign 5: All the Names of Fraternities and Sororities Sound Similar

All the different Greek tags and titles sound the same the to you. It’s hard to keep track of all the names when you’re not in a sorority. To you, all of the sororities are called Kappa Sigma Delta Omicron Gamma. Wait, isn’t there a Pi too?

Sign 6: You Envy the Formals

When you stalk your friends’, who are in sororities, pictures you get jealous of their opportunities to dress up fancy and being allowed to act classy for the night. But after a bit of stalking, you get over it, and go back to enjoying your sweatpants wearing, ‘Varsity Party’ weekend.

Sign 7: You Don’t Own One of ‘Those’ Bags

You see them on every college campus: massive canvas tote bags, usually black, emblazoned with letters that belong to an ancient language. You don’t own one of those bags, you just merely see them from afar and carry your notebook in your Jansport or Urban Outfitters backpack.

Sign 8: Your Friends Aren’t Your Sisters

Your sister is not some girl you just met this year, your sister is actually that bitch down the hall of your childhood home, who has been stealing your clothes or serving as a tattle tale to your parents your entire life.

Well girls, there you have it. Those were just some of the random things that I have noticed that differentiates the sorority sisters from girls like me. Comment below with other signs you may have experienced during your time at college!

Image: http://www.fanpop.com


9 thoughts on “8 Signs You’re NOT in a Sorority

  1. This is pointless.

    3. There are many non-Greek girls attending tailgates. Since when was an “invite” necessary? Also, many parking lot tailgates include alcohol, it’s up to the individuals and is not exclusive to fraternity tailgates.
    4. Just because a girl isn’t in a sorority doesn’t mean that she doesn’t have a lot of friends. Yes, sororities are a great way to meet girls and make friends, but they’re not the only way. Some girls are involved in academic organizations, clubs, sports, jobs, whatever.
    8. The most untrue. People can form such intimate bonds even if they aren’t in sororities. Just because there isn’t a “sister” label on it doesn’t mean that such a relationship does not exist. Furthermore, there are many sororities where certain sisters fight with each other or do not act sisterly towards one another.

    Stop trying to make Greek Life seem like some elitist society where everyone else sucks.


  2. ^ El oh effing el. Yes, everyone’s opposition to this article is based in political correctness. I’m sure it can’t possibly have anything to do with being patronized by some little naive skank who needs to feel like her college club is important and elite.

    Let’s not beat around the bush here: The comments have been absolutely correct in their feedback. I’m sure once upon a time greek life was truly elite and fancy. Then like everything, the masses like the author had to go and ruin it by needing to constantly justify faux-superiority due to raging insecurity. Simply put, the author wrote this because they wanna make believe they have actual merit to offer their opinions on society, as a result of paying $3,000 a year to be in a friendship club. I was in Greek life and I had a great experience, but that doesn’t mean I can’t see through the defining shallow nature of this “piece” or other poor aspects of Greek life at large in general. There is a difference between an opinion piece, and an opinion piece based in the narcissistic delusions of an insecure 19 year old girl. Being that this is the latter, it’s hardly surprising that “people” would try to relate political correctness to opposing this piece;If anything, that’s the only humor here, seeing as I can offer nothing but pity towards the author.

    If anyone disagrees with my OPINIONS, then state your case based in logic and facts, not ad hominems and such. Pro tip though to the defenders: You might just wanna sit this one out and inform the author she went a little far here,but until then, keep blaming the GDIs and political correctness……….


    • Dear AlumTerp,

      First off, thanks so much for commenting on this piece! It really means a lot to us at Unwritten when our readers our compelled enough by a piece to comment on it! However, I think you may have been confused by the tone of my piece. To me it seems that you believe I am involved in Greek Life, and that I was critiquing sororities from a member of a sorority’s point of view. I just want to let you know up front that I am not involved in any Panhellenic group whatsoever, and that I wrote this piece merely as an outsider looking in, hoping to provide a comedic narrative for girls like me. Thanks for your comment and I hope you continue to read Unwritten!


  3. all of you guys commenting this piece are beyond ridiculous… the blogger states in the article SHE IS NOT IN GREEK LIFE. Sooo she is obviously talking about her OPINION about NOT being in it. So chill the fuck out and make sure you read the piece before you bitch about it.


  4. We absolutely love your blog and find many of your posts to be precisely what Im looking for. Do you offer guest writers to write content in your case? I wouldnt mind writing a post or elaborating on a few of the subjects you write in relation to here. Again, awesome weblog!


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