If you were stranded on a deserted island and had your choice of one food to eat before you were left to fend for yourself, what would it be? Pizza, of course. If you could eat only one food for the rest of your life, what would it be? Pizza, of course. And If you were going to die, what would you want your last meal to be? Pizza, of course.
A war rages on here in College Park, a war I like to call World War Pizza. Why? Because pizza is a lifestyle, and sometimes there are too many options to choose from.
World War Pizza [wurld wawr peet-suh] noun: a conflict within oneself carried on by force of leavened bread, tomato sauce, melted cheese and toppings.
Let me guess, this sounds all too familiar to you. And why shouldn’t it? College Park has become infamous for the bajillion pizza places that opened all at once. Luckily and somewhat unfortunately, there are so many options making it increasingly more difficult to decide where to indulge in this collegiate delicacy. So, what’s a Terp to choose?
Papa John’s: the home of the cookie pizza
Pros: Local for all you College Ave peeps, not to mention Papa is always there for you when you need a helping hand, a helping hand of cheesy bread that is. Not to mention, Papa is the papa to the infamous cookie pizza. Need I say more? Looking for a steal? Papa offers a student special of $6.99 for a large pie.
Cons: Nothing special, you can eat Papa John’s anywhere you are. Not to mention, if you decide to dine in College Park’s wondrous franchise of Papa John’s, your only seating option is a windowsill.
Pizza Authentica: hashtag Varsity and View livin’
Pros: You live all the way down Route 1 and don’t feel like power-walking ten whole minutes to experience one of the newest crazes, right? Have no fear, Freshman Connection Terps (and anyone else who feels like living in luxury), Pizza Authentica is here.
Cons: I would barely call this a pizza place. And to be honest, as a previous Freshman Connection chick, the pizza really isn’t all that authentica.
Ratsie’s: your friendly corner restaurant
Pros: Classic and a College Park staple, need I say more?
Cons: Ultimate freshman move. Entrance not suggested during daylight hours.
Slices: the ultimate creative experience
Pros: Slices is new, which means it’s hot hot hot. Literally though, the pizza is hot. There is a slice for any craving or desire you may have, and with names like the Mona Lisa, the Coney Island and the Works, how could you not delve right into your creative hungry pizza freedom? Gluten-free? No problem. Feeling like you need a healthier diet? Try the whole-wheat pizza crust. Can’t decide between pizza and Mac and Cheese? No problem, at Slices, you can have macaroni on your pizza. Hooray.
Cons: In a hurry and feel like leaving the house in sweatpants with no makeup on, ladies? Sorry, you are guaranteed to run into at least three people you know. I’d opt for some mascara. Also, I’m on a budget, I’m for sure not made of money. At $3.59 a slice, I’m not completely confident I’m getting the bang for my slices buck.
Pizza Kingdom: the biggest slice of pizza you’ve ever seen
Pros: The jumbo slice really offers the best picture for your Instagram account and a guaranteed 50 likes, at the least. That’s really all I have to say for Pizza Kingdom, aside from the fact that it’ll keep you full for days. Seriously, one slice is like a whole week’s worth of meals.
Cons: Not all Pizza Kingdom locations serve breakfast, ugh. Sorry if that’s random, but that’s what the million pamphlets at my house told me. Also, trying to test out your portion control skills? Probably not your best bet. Ever hear the phrase quality not quantity? Pizza Kingdom may not have jumped on that bandwagon. Aside from being large and in charge, there isn’t much to cheer about.
Check out how betches love to indulge in pizza:
It may be time to pick your pizza poison and satisfy your craving in one of College Park’s many pizza places. My only hope is that you truly consider the pros and cons when deciding where to dine. World War Pizza rages on, but pizza is love, so grab a slice.